Write a little bigger, darling

Not too long ago a certain lady asked me to write Inception fic. I told her it was probably a bad idea, but did it anyway. Yes, obviously it was a bad idea.
Two song meme fills and one tombola prompt from which you can easily deduce that:
1) I multiship;
2) I love Ariadne;
3) I can't write Ariadne.
Ergo, I'll probably stick to Arthur/Eames in the future and cry a little.

Arthur(/Eames) - Touch-a, Touch-a, Touch-a, Touch me for darkmagic_luvr
Ariadne(/Arthur) - Servant of Evil for mizunosakura
Grass green for the prompt... grass green (Inception, Ariadne)

All PG-rated and very much drabblish. The bulk of my writing effort today was the epic steampunk saga. I've written the opening scene, or at least part of the opening scene. It's 1,500 words where nothing at all happens. I'm all, man, you have to go out there and get shot! And my characters sit around making idle conversation and refuse to get the plot going. WTF.

I think I need a beta. Yesterday I ordered my sister to read my latest opus and find some damn mistakes to correct but she said it was all fine by her. NOT HELPFUL DUDE. I know I barf mistakes all over my stories. It's fine for short pieces but if I'm really going to write the epic steampunk saga I need to get off my butt and start doing things like proofreading and possibly find one of those anal betas that complain about every sentence they read. Why do I never come across those?